Wasabi

...Is not a condiment...it is a weapon.

I had a conversation with a friend of mine about the terms of courtship. She doesn't agree that someone should feign interest in something just to get to know the other person. I, on the other hand argued that while one shouldn't pretend to have a mutual interest in something in order to impress the other person (therefore building a false kinship), one should instead take it as an opening to explore the other person. For example, if someone invited you to a Flaming Lips concert, and you don't like the Flaming Lips, you shouldn't say, "I love the Flaming Lips." Instead, one should say, "I'd love to check them out." You're expressing interest in trying something new instead of expressing false interest in something you know nothing about.

However, does even approaching a situation like this with the sole intent of getting to know the other person still inherently deceptive? If you decide to go to the Flaming Lips concert, the other person will probably assume you like the Flaming Lips, even if you don't explicitly say so. It would be foolish to say, "I don't like the Flaming Lips, but I'll come anyway." That's just...weird, for lack of a better term. Nor, should someone say, "I'd love to come just to get to know you." Once again, weird.

So how does one go about accepting or rejecting an invitation to an activity from the object of their desire? I personally do not see the problem in at least approaching the situation as both a new experience and as an opportunity to get to know the other person. If that person assumes you have interest in the activity when you don't, you should be able to say, "Well, that wasn't really my taste, but would you like to go see Depeche Mode with me?" If the person accepts, great. If the person rejects, then try to find an activity you'll mutually enjoy. The great thing about it is you've at least already experienced something with one another, and you'll have something to talk about, something to relate on, and most importantly, you'll have a base for the relationship to grow from. Go for it.

The wasabi comment was completely random. I tried it for the first time today, and I almost had a brain aneurism.